5 Fun Ways to Enjoy the Army-Navy Game for Those Forced to Watch It

Believe it or not, there are people out there who don't like watching football. Then there are those who only watch the NFL. There are also people who like college football, but only care about the teams who might be national champions. There are even people who just love to watch, but don't want to see 200 rushing plays. When it comes to the Army-Navy Game, which will be played for the 125th time at 3 p.m. on Saturday, Dec. 14, 2024, chances are good the only people who definitely want to watch are academy alumni (and maybe their family members).

Still, many people end up stuck watching "America's Game," either because it's the only game on that particular Saturday or because it's part of some mandatory funday in a unit ruled by an academy alum. No matter the reason, there are still a few things you can do to have fun for four hours.

1. Play Army-Navy Game Bingo

Certain things are expected to happen during the pregame and the Army-Navy Game itself. There's a lot of marching. When the president of the United States shows up, CBS will cut to him like he's Taylor Swift at Arrowhead Stadium. There's even an occasional pass downfield.

There are so many things that will just happen at one point, we've created this set of eight handy bingo cards for you all to use to make a game of it. The winner gets to be the first one to say they aren't feeling well and leave at halftime.

2. Bet on It

Sports betting apps are all the rage nowadays, allowing viewers to take an extra, more personal stake in the games they're watching. There is no minimum bet on most of those apps, so if your state allows online sports betting, make some insane one-dollar parlays and see whether you can't make this time worth your while.

If your state doesn't allow online or app-based sports betting, start a pool with the rest of the crowd or make a few side bets and see where that gets you. If you have issues with self-control, however, it's probably best to sit quietly and make color commentary to your friends. The more you drink, the better your Cris Collinsworth impression gets!

3. Create Your Own Drinking Game

Cannon gets fired? Drink. Camera cuts to Bill the Goat? Drink. Passing touchdown? Waterfall! Even if you know nothing about "America's Game," it'll take all of the first quarter to figure out a solid set of rules to pass the time.

For those of you who are watching the Army-Navy Game in the presence of the rest of your unit, it's probably best to take your drinks with a low ABV beverage. And everyone should ensure they have a designated driver. Remember: Nobody wants to be the reason for a safety brief.

4. Get to Know Your Peers

Listen, I know: There's nothing worse than listening to an academy grad wax prosaically about their old academy days, especially if you enlisted for the college money and still haven't started (yet). Stories about plebes, sashes and dunking rings in the seven seas are about as fun as learning celestial navigation. But it might help you curry favor if there's an Article 15 in your future.

You never know what you might find out about the people in your unit. See whether you can find a prior enlisted officer. It's not hard: They're second lieutenants who look like they're 40. Maybe you can find the enlisted troublemaker. This is also not that hard: They're E-5s or E-6s who look like they're 40. They both have a lot of stories that they should absolutely not be sharing at a unit function.

5. Just Pick a Team and Cheer for Them, No Matter What

It really doesn't matter, so just choose one. Choose one based on your own branch of service. Or by the coolest uniform. Or through catching a tiger by the toe. It's the last regular-season game of the season for both; if either of them made it to the college playoff, it would be national news.

And it's not as though anyone will expect you to actually follow the team next season. This game exists in a vacuum every year, and their conference championship happens the week before the Army-Navy Game regardless. Even if you know your team is going to lose, you cheer for them anyway. New York Jets fans have been doing this for decades. Who knows: You might end up actually becoming a fan of one of the teams.

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